Post by Indiana on Aug 22, 2004 8:09:09 GMT -8
Guess I must be in a rambling mode today hey ...
Has anyone of you ever been stalked? I'd be interested in your thoughts whether yes or no!
I've been stalked for many years by various people, and my first stalker was when I was in secondary school aged 15. A boy used to follow me home every day, used to stare at me in corners at school (really spooky), used to follow my every move and would write me love letters, even when I moved to London (I lived in Singapore when growing up). Thankfully the distance soon proved too much and he turned his attentions on someone else.
I'm 39 now (yikes) and since aged 25, I have been stalked by a friend of mine, yup it usually is people you know. He'd wait for me to get home from work, always be outside my door, knew exactly when I went shopping, would follow me to the supermarket, would always call, was a handyman for me and would use the fact that I was a single white female and living on my own and the fact that I needed help around the house to get into my house and would overstay his welcome. I complained to his wife and it didn't stop (he's married with 5 children); and on and off over the years I've made a stand and asked him to stay away ... I have refused to answer the door to him since last August (almost a year now) and he goes to visit my mom to find out stuff about me.
I have to always make sure my curtains are shut, that the doors are locked as he usually is in his car outside in the street waiting for me, watching and waiting; and will ring the doorbell as soon as I get home; and sometimes will wait outside for 2-3 hours after I've gotten home ringing the doorbell. When confronted he will deny that it was him. It goes on and on .... I've considered calling the police and filing a restraining order but he is a really close friend of mine (when he's not obsessed about me).
It's been happening for so many years in my life, not just with the two guys above .... being a single female perhaps is the issue (I really don't know). I've been in my current house for 6 years now and whenever I go outside to the front lawn to water the garden or do any painting to the front of the house etc you can bet anything guys will chat me up ... there's a young guy across the road who always waits outside his window waiting for me to get home and will watch me all the time go in and out of my house; and when I'm outside trying to paint etc he will come up to me and ask if he can help and has asked whether I'd go out on a date with him. Come on! He's like 19 years old! I told him I wasn't interested cos I was "way too old for him" but he didn't care! DOH! I don't look my age and can pass for a twenty something but these things that keep happening to me really freak me out sometimes.
I don't have the personality that can be rude to someone and tell them to p**^^ off if they come up and talk to me as I don't like to hurt anyone and will always consider someone else's feelings, yeah perhaps to my detriment. It's a lesson in life for me .... now I avoid going outside on my own and if I do, then I'll ask a male friend to help me paint cos I don't want the attention that I get if I do it alone. It wouldn't be so bad if it was hunky guys (grins) that were asking me but then again I'd still turn down a hunky guy cos they would find my energy (I've worked on myself a long time) too *bright* for use of a word. Like attracts like and I'm no longer attracted to someone who drinks, smokes, mood alters etc .... been there, done it!
Ok, enough rambling ... hope I made grammatical sense etc ... if not, pardon moi! I haven't checked it for sensibility etc ... as I've got to get some housework and dinner going .... it's dinner time in London and I need to do some laundry too! A woman's work is never done!!
Has anyone of you ever been stalked? I'd be interested in your thoughts whether yes or no!
I've been stalked for many years by various people, and my first stalker was when I was in secondary school aged 15. A boy used to follow me home every day, used to stare at me in corners at school (really spooky), used to follow my every move and would write me love letters, even when I moved to London (I lived in Singapore when growing up). Thankfully the distance soon proved too much and he turned his attentions on someone else.
I'm 39 now (yikes) and since aged 25, I have been stalked by a friend of mine, yup it usually is people you know. He'd wait for me to get home from work, always be outside my door, knew exactly when I went shopping, would follow me to the supermarket, would always call, was a handyman for me and would use the fact that I was a single white female and living on my own and the fact that I needed help around the house to get into my house and would overstay his welcome. I complained to his wife and it didn't stop (he's married with 5 children); and on and off over the years I've made a stand and asked him to stay away ... I have refused to answer the door to him since last August (almost a year now) and he goes to visit my mom to find out stuff about me.
I have to always make sure my curtains are shut, that the doors are locked as he usually is in his car outside in the street waiting for me, watching and waiting; and will ring the doorbell as soon as I get home; and sometimes will wait outside for 2-3 hours after I've gotten home ringing the doorbell. When confronted he will deny that it was him. It goes on and on .... I've considered calling the police and filing a restraining order but he is a really close friend of mine (when he's not obsessed about me).
It's been happening for so many years in my life, not just with the two guys above .... being a single female perhaps is the issue (I really don't know). I've been in my current house for 6 years now and whenever I go outside to the front lawn to water the garden or do any painting to the front of the house etc you can bet anything guys will chat me up ... there's a young guy across the road who always waits outside his window waiting for me to get home and will watch me all the time go in and out of my house; and when I'm outside trying to paint etc he will come up to me and ask if he can help and has asked whether I'd go out on a date with him. Come on! He's like 19 years old! I told him I wasn't interested cos I was "way too old for him" but he didn't care! DOH! I don't look my age and can pass for a twenty something but these things that keep happening to me really freak me out sometimes.
I don't have the personality that can be rude to someone and tell them to p**^^ off if they come up and talk to me as I don't like to hurt anyone and will always consider someone else's feelings, yeah perhaps to my detriment. It's a lesson in life for me .... now I avoid going outside on my own and if I do, then I'll ask a male friend to help me paint cos I don't want the attention that I get if I do it alone. It wouldn't be so bad if it was hunky guys (grins) that were asking me but then again I'd still turn down a hunky guy cos they would find my energy (I've worked on myself a long time) too *bright* for use of a word. Like attracts like and I'm no longer attracted to someone who drinks, smokes, mood alters etc .... been there, done it!
Ok, enough rambling ... hope I made grammatical sense etc ... if not, pardon moi! I haven't checked it for sensibility etc ... as I've got to get some housework and dinner going .... it's dinner time in London and I need to do some laundry too! A woman's work is never done!!